Different Ideas about British People

    I hate mondays. -- Garfield
我恨星期一。 -- 加菲
Never send a man to do a cat's job. -- Garfield
决不要让人去做猫的工作。 -- 加菲
Money is not everything. There’s Mastercard & Visa.
钞票不是万能的,有时还需要信用卡。
One should love animals. They are so tasty.
每个人都应该热爱动物,因为它们很好吃。

SALLY HAD LIVED ABROAD MOST OF HER LIFE, BUT AT LAST SHE CAME BACK TO ENGLAND TO LIVE. SHE HAD ALWAYS LOVED TREES AND FLOWERS, AND NOW SHE AIMED TO<注1> BUY A SMALL HOUSE IN THE COUNTRY WITH A GARDEN. SHE HAD MANAGED TO<注2> SAVE QUITE A LOT OF MONEY WHILE WORKING IN HOSPITALS IN FOREIGN COUNTRIES, SO SHE HOPED TO BE ABLE TO BUY SOMETHI

第七法、爆笑英语：好好学习，天天向上
　　周奔驰：你的英语达到几级？四级、六级？
　　CAN YOU TELL ME YOUR LEVEL OF ENGLISH, LEVEL 4 OR LEVEL 6?
　　黄小蓉:刚过四级。
　　JUST PASSED LEVEL 4.

真的不好意思，我活脱脱就是书中“周奔驰”的原型，只不过，我比周奔驰还要笨一点、懒一点、没毅力一点。当然，我比他要成熟，也就是“大”一点的意思。我已经32岁了，虽然还是“王老五”一个。我是山东某所师范学院历史系的专科毕业生，1990年毕业。读大专的时候，英语课只是选修课，我义无反顾地……没有选择英语课！——唉，现在真是后悔莫及！毕业后，屡次想重学英语，但每次都像周奔驰一样“毅力永远是短暂的，换来的只是无穷无尽的痛苦跟长叹”。所以，高中水平的英语一扔就是14年。加上在工作上要“像牲口

The Country Squire
In a small pretty village in Notting ham shire there formerly lived a respectable Squire， who excelled all his friends in amusements athletic， and whose manner of living was far f

Online Chat

A Thank-you Letter
"Are you writing a thank-you letter to Grandpa like told you?"
"Yes, Mum."
"Your handwriting seems very large."
"Well, Grandpa's deaf, so I'm writing very loud."
感谢信
“你是在按照我说的给爷爷写信感谢他吗？”
“是的，妈妈。”
“你的字好像写得太大了。”
“嗯，爷爷的耳朵不好，所以我写得大声点儿。”

Excited Remarks
　　Our son, at age of five, had a fascination for motorcycles. The sight of one would always bring forth squeals of delight, accompanied by excited remarks of "Look at that! Look at that! I’m going to have one of those someday," his dad’s response always was "Not as long as I’m alive."
　　One day, wh

One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I se

fish say
What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall?
"dam!!!"
鱼说
当鱼游进一个水泥墙里面的时候，鱼会说什么?
"水坝!!!"
NOTE
cement wall n. 水泥墙

Essay
    Teacher had set his class an essay in "A Game of Cricket". After two minutes Simon Steel handed his paper in and was allowed to go home. His essay read: "Rain s

A Rich Father
John D．Rocke feller， the wellkn own millionaire，gave away millions， but he himself was very mean about small sums of money． One day

The Rain
A small boy and his father were having a walk in the country when it suddenly began to rain very hard． They did not have their umbrella with them， and there was nowhere to hide from the rai

What Is a Traitor？
Young hopeful：“Father，what is a traitor in politics？”
Father（a veteran politician）：“A traitor is a man who leaves our party and goes over to the other one．”
Young hopeful：“Well then，what is a man who leaves his party and comes over to yours？”
Father：“A convert，my son．”