整理时间: 2004/11/9
--Charles Dickens/查尔斯.狄更斯
The pure.the bright,the beautiful, 一切纯洁的,辉煌的,美丽的,
Tha

整理时间: 2004/11/9
Today we have higher buildings and wider highways,but shorter temperaments and narrower points of v

整理时间: 2004/11/9
－G.Herbert/赫伯特
Sweet day,so cool,so calm,so bright! 甜美的白昼，如此凉爽、安宁、明媚！
The brida

整理时间: 2004/11/9
I’ll give you some advice about life.
给你生活的忠告
Eat more roughage;
多吃些粗粮；
Do

I was puzzled! Why was this old woman making such a fuss about an old copse which was of no use to anybody? She had written letters to the local paper, even to a national, protesting about a projected by-pass to her village, and, looking at a map, the route was nowhere near where she lived and it wasn't as if the area was attrac

A New Drug 一种新药
Jack:I have invented a new drug which could kill lice effectively.
Tom:That's wonderful. How is it used?
Jack:When you catch a louse, just put a little of that drug on its mouth and it will die immediately.
一种新药
杰克:我发明了一种新药能有效地杀死虱子。
汤姆:太

A Drunkard
A drunkard in a bar saw a man coming in with a duck under his arm and asked,"What are you doing with the pig?"
The new comer said it was a duck, not a pig.
"I was talking to the duck,not to you,"the drunkard replied.
酒鬼
在酒吧间，有一个酒鬼看见一个人腋下夹着

Ads Gone Bad 问题广告
千万不要以为这些是笑话！它们可是美国分类广告中的真实语言。这些句子要不是语言模棱两可，可以这样理解，也可以那样理解；要不就是印错或使用错了单词，造成了歧义。看来美国人还真是挺幽默的啊！
裁缝广告
We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
我们不使用机器撕毁您的衣服。我们会小心翼翼地用手撕。
(原意是要表达：我们不使用机器，以避免撕毁您的衣服。我们会用手工小心地修补衣服。)

A New Record
Airman(After landing in a tree):I was trying to make a new record.
Farmer:You did. You're the first man to climb down that tree before climbing up it.
一项新纪录
飞行员（着陆在树上之后）：我在试图创造一项新的纪录。
农夫：你已经做到了。你是第一个不用爬上树就从树上爬下来的人。

A medical student doing a rotation in toxicology at a poison control center told this story to his local newspaper.  "Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be

Baby-sitter
Baby-sitter said to Amy's parents,"By the way, I promised Amy that if she'd go to bed without any fuss, you'd buy her a pony in the morning."
保姆
保姆对家长说：“顺便说一下，我已经答应艾米，如果她不吵闹去睡觉，早上你们就会给她买一匹小马。”

Best Way
Mary loved Tom, but she worried about all the money he squandered when they went out together. "How can I stop Tom from spending so much money on me?"She asked her mother.
"Marry him!"
最好的办法
玛丽很爱汤姆，但是她对他们一起出去时，汤姆所有乱花的钱很发愁。“我怎么做才能阻止汤姆在我身上花那么多的钱呢

Don't Pay the Bill
Tom: How can I stop water from coming into my house.
Sam: Don't pay the water bill.
不交水费
汤姆：我怎么才能阻止水进入我的房间？
山姆：不交水费。

We Left Nothing
　　Mrs Brown was going out for the day. She locked the house and tacked a note for the milkman on the door: "NOBODY HOME. DON'T LEAVE ANYTHING."
　　When she got back that night, she found her door broken open and her h

Something Really Cheap 
After being away on business, Tim thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift.
"How about some perfume?", he asked the cosmetics clerk. She showed him a $50.00 bottle.
"That's a bit much", said Tim, so she returned with a small